Canada is Free and Freedom is Its Nationality

Sir Wilfrid Laurier

Thursday, May 27, 2010

Stats, I Love Stats

I found this cute little map online, it tells you all the "International Number Ones: Because Every Country is Good at Something". Now I was going to post this as a little politically incorrect satirical joke, until I discovered that it was true.... But leaving all the politically incorrect bits aside (as I know my readers won't when they follow the link) do you want to know what Canada's number one is? Fruit juice consumption! I mean really how, utterly bland, effeminate (I speak as a woman), and just generally Canadian blah is that? It sounds like something a PSA would celebrate. For the record we are also number one in oats consumption (something my parents dutifully support every morning, did I mention that I hate oatmeal?), are half as fat as the States, and have the lowest daily smoking rate. Alright already, we've settled the fact that we are health freaks. (And no dear children I do not support that nasty, dangerous habit of smoking, it makes your hair smell and then you have to have lots of baths where the water gets in your eyes so never, ever do it)

We are also really good when it comes to unpaid diplomatic parking fines (????), horrible when it comes to registered voter turnout , but good when it comes to length of time people spend in school (so we are educated and apathetic, I'm sure this should tell me something). We do produce a lot of books (Thank Canadian government subsidies for useless trash) and have the biggest houses (use the low smoking one on the liberals and sneak this past when they are still beaming about that.). In other news we have the shortest prison sentences. (Which won't stop wining about how we are so mean to criminals)

At 60% we are #4 when it comes to being very proud of your country only beating out Ireland, Australia, and the United States (duh). So much for the Canadians not being patriotic thing (Although the fruit juice and oats stats gave my patriotism a nasty hit), also so much for the German nationalism thing, they hit last with 20%. In a move that doesn't surprise me, Canada ties for last place when it comes to considering people of a different race as undesirable neighbours and ties for next to last when answering the same question about immigrants with 5 and 6% respectively. In a move that does slightly surprise me and is probably completely bewildering to the anti-America pro-Europe people, America scored better than some of our progressive and socialist betters like Norway, France, Belgium, and in one case Finland. Incidentally 17% of Fins and 14% of Norwegians don't want to live beside someone of another race, rub that in the faces of all the people who want to tell us how progressive, liberal, and compassionate Norway is (memo to my Norwegian aunt, don't read this post okay?).

We love to boycott and petition and we are pretty good when it comes to being interested in and talking about politics but we don't join political parties or, as I mentioned earlier, vote. Interestingly we trust the armed forces, church, police and companies more than we trust the civil service. Which makes me wonder if a proposal for a forcible take over by the armed forces and police of the civil service and a subsequent hand over to private corporations with oversight from the church might reawaken interest in politics. Never know. Oh, and the only thing we trust less than Parliament? Trade unions. (You really are fighting a losing battle here Layton)

In stunning news, only 8% of women believe they have equal rights (Time to start defunding a few more grievance-mongering "think" tanks Harper) and we are number one for lone-parents families, thus besting the UK (More ???s) at 11%. We also have lower personal income and property tax than the US (but higher income tax than the UK) and more known terrorist organizations present than the US, Sudan, Sri Lanka, and Bangladesh (one really assumes that this is not based on, say, deadliness and group membership numbers) and has the same number as Iran. We are also number five in arms exports, which calls into slight question the assumptions about arms exporting nations (Or doesn't depending on how much you like Canada, I like Canada) mind you the numbers fall off pretty sharply once you get Russia, the US, and France out of the way.

Isn't Trivial Pursuit fun?


Note: Not all stats have the same number of countries involved...

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Negligent? Never

No not negligent exactly... just juggling the National Student Forum (5 stars by the way), the National Prayer Breakfast (attached to said Forum), work (in real life I actually have a job to pay for college since blogging declines to pay, I'm not just a formless vapor inhabiting a computer keyboard), The National March for Life (awesome!), the Campaign Life Coalition Pro-Life Youth Conference (and heard Lisa Rose live), and working for the Family Coalition Party (great party by the way) as a writer/researcher/youth person....

But live in the wide world has gone on with the good and the bad. Here are a few things for you to get good and miffed, or good and excited about. Depending on inclination and orientation.

From the world of "duh" we get this gem, politicians would rather you not know how they spend their (our) money. However, Canadians are expressing a lively curiosity to know the answers to certain questions. Namely, who gets to resign first? And will so many people resign that we are forced to call a general election? Actually that may be the only credible reason to keep the books shut, from the perspective of the public which is, or so received wisdom tells us, tired of elections. As for me? Well I am a political geek and all political geeks enjoy elections so open them us says I. has a petition on the subject so all those notorious troublemakers, who would like nothing better than to see a few dozen heads (or a few hundred) explode all over the Hill and make a big green slimy mess a la Men in Black (which is high on my list of Absolute Worst Movies Ever Made FYI) and an election called where three quarters of the current sitting parliament aren't allowed to run, can make their voices heard.

I know this isn't popular to say in some Canadian conservative circles but Barbara Amiel has a tendency to really annoy me. In fact she not infrequently either inspires visions of throwing magazines at hard walls or inspires snores and/or incomprehension at the high level of complete "You wasted words on that?!". Her sympathy and advocacy for perpetrators of sexual abuse is what tends to inspire the first reaction. Why am I writing this? Do I have to have a reason? Well I just saw something about a petition to release Roman Polanski signed by all manner of Hollywood peoples (which tells you everything you need to know about Hollywood), and I remember something Amiel wrote about him that was really, really annoying...

This is the really important bit. The bit where we prove, yet again, that Canadian judges have brains and HRT don't have, like, any. Or should I say, Canadian judges have half a brain. The Ontario Divisional Court has ruled that you can still be a distinctively Christian organization and serve people with disabilities regardless of their faith. However they ruled, confusingly and contradictorily to some, that Heintz shouldn't have been dismissed. It seems that you can impose moral codes on people who might be in places of influence or evangelism, bathing and feeding people don't count. Could have been worse, could have been better. The first part especially is a vitally important ruling for faith organizations. What were the options? No Christian aid or charity organizations? Would the Salvation Army be forced to drop any religious requirements for officers? Or would they have to make sure that every homeless person they help is a Christian before they can give them food? Would a foreign aid agency have to ask the person screaming in pain and trapped under a fallen building in an earthquake zone if they were Christian, and be forced to leave them if they weren't? That is basically the position that Christian charities were left in after the OHRT ruling that they couldn't discriminate (for example require workers or board members to be Christians) if they served people who weren't Christians.

In other news that will be important soon, or soonish knowing the speed that Tribunals work at, mediation has failed in the case of the gay alter server and the Catholic church. $20,000 because you complained to the priest about whether someone is an appropriate choice for alter server? Are you kidding me? Talk about expensive opinions. He also wants the government to force the Bishop to preach a sermon about the dangers of rumors and innuendo in creating hate and discrimination. Let me repeat that. He wants the government to force the Bishop to preach a sermon. Do I need to repeat that?

Friday, May 7, 2010

Like? You Think?

A fantastic video, vimeo instead of YouTube for a change. I sometimes suffer from this myself, I think. You know? Do you think so because I think but maybe I don't and I just don't really know but I qualify too much maybe?

Typography from Ronnie Bruce on Vimeo.

Tuesday, May 4, 2010

Roundup: Shriveling Weeds and Catching Horses

Welcome to Miss Marprelate's Rare and Wonderful Roundups of News that You Should Know.

After considerable time spent telling us that the attack on Times Square was not necessarily the work of Islamist terrorism and could very well be the work of a homegrown terrorist, someone mad at the healthcare bill, ad nauseum they have finally managed to arrest someone who is, wait for it... an Islamist terrorist. Gee, that I could have never forseen. Not of course that I could find the word Muslim or Islamist in either of two NP articles I read, but I'll take any bet going about the motives. BCF

Returning again to the quest for bigfoot, also known as a conservative women who's accomplishments and toughness feminists will respect. Yes, you guessed it, the sighting turned out to be another oddly shaped tree trunk, or rather a woman who is being forced by a man (and consenting to participate in a cringing display of lap dog subservience) to bully other women. Was that a little unclear? Let's reword it. Senator Nancy Ruth, in what I might otherwise expect feminists to call a strong vindication of the belief that women can be just as tough in the world of politics as men, told some activists to "Shut the **** up" and stop pushing the abortion funding in foreign aid question because it had just turned into a political football. In other words she was putting into practice this stirring observation,

"I think women have been told too often to be quiet, be good and then you'll get what you want, I guess my argument is when have women ever made progress and got what they want by keeping quiet?" (NP)

Saturday, May 1, 2010

A Little Advertising

And no I'm not getting any money, free samples, and/or any other type of compensation for any of this. Mind you, if someone wants to offer...

Apathy is Boring: I mean seriously, where else can you vote on what song your ideal politician would have on his iPod?

Free Canuckistan: Miss Marprelate's secret source for, a lot. Besides, he noticed the hat.

Sermon Audio: AKA the one stop shop for all things Christian... and it is all, or almost all free! (I even got to meet the founder in Cincinnati)

SDA Matt: Political videos of the most Corenish type.

Wintery Knight:
To appease broad hints.

Ezra Levant: What do you mean you don't know who he is?! You, you, U of O student type you!

Blazing Cat Fur: Who has a fiendish cunning when it comes to tracking down people's identities and Facebook affiliations.

Albert Mohler: Because his daily email of links keeps me up to date. And because he runs a great show.

Small Dead Animals - The Roadkill Diaries: For the most eminently unforgettable name ever, and interesting content.

Deborah Gyapong: One of the bloggers I have met in person.

This is a small list of some sites I like. More to come later... (Like the next time I need to write a post and don't want to)